#3 - Absurdity on the highest scale
#3 Absurdity on the highest scale
Here’s some jokes for you:
Q: Do you know why there’s a hole in a man’s penis? A: So he can get air to his brain.
Q: If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story building at the same time, who would reach the ground first?
A: The woman, the man would get lost.
Q: What do you call a man with half a brain?
A: Gifted.
Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.
You hear it all the time. Women are smarter than men. On average, women have higher I.Q’s. Etc. Etc. I’m glad women get enjoyment from jokes like these. It must give them a ego boost, or something. Because from my experiences with women, just the opposite is true. Women make some of the DUMBEST ass decisions when it comes to dating and relationships. Really, I’m talking about absurdity on the highest scale. If you’re reading this and take issue with what I am saying, then you’re probably a dumb bitch yourself.
See, something I’ve never understood about women is this idea that you can change and mold a piece of shit into a marble sculpture of David. Try, try as you may. Go ahead. Polish him up. It was the Walgreens parking lot. When you met him he was unemployed. He had no ambition. No goals for the future. So what if he occasionally flirts with a girl or two when you’re out and about. He has a swagger about him that you are immensely attracted too. And the dick is good. QUALITY dick. So you keep him around, and sure enough 6 months later the dude is working. Driving YOUR car to get to that job, but it’s all good. He’s making money, not a lot. But it’s ok, because he loves you and you love him. Right?
GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!! Have we forgotten so soon what your little “work of art” is made of? Shit. Always was shit. Always will be shit. Oh yeah, it may have the outward appearance of David. However, its composition is completely shit. Through and through. So while you’re at work, thinking about this guy. Bragging to your girlfriends how good he is, he is using your car to get some ass from the bitch he was flirting with at Walgreens. Now that he’s working, he has a little pocket change too. So he can buy her material things and keep her ditsy ass content.
One day, you catch David slippin’. He’s left some text messages in his phone from Walgreens girl. You confront you on it. He says, “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it”. And just like most women, you let it slide. See, some of you reading may think that is where the first mistake was committed. NO!!! The mistake was fuckin’ with David to begin with. You KNEW he was a playa from Jump Street. Shit, we are on mistake # 3 or 4 at this point. The dude is driving your car. In some cases, living with the chick. All the while steadily continuing with his player ways. Are you feeling me? To the women reading this blog, does this shit start to make since? Oh wise and intelligent beings…
Let’s continue. So of course situations continue to arise that make you begin to doubt this guys fidelity. He keeps on to lying. Each lie getting bigger. With each occurrence, instead of leaving the relationship, you continue to convince yourself otherwise. Is it self-esteem issues? Is it the thought of having wasted 6 months…2 years…10 years on some bullshit relationship and having to start over from scratch? Women come on. Tell me something. Give me an answer. WHY DO YOU STAY?!
When you finally do leave the bum, then all I hear women say is that men are dogs. That men aren’t worth a damn. See, that’s where you women are wrong. See, David wasn’t the only guy that approached you that day. You were approached earlier that day inside of Walgreens. The guy wasn’t dressed to impress. But he wasn’t looking like a bum either. He didn’t have the braggadocio style like David. But when he introduced himself, he did it in a respectful manner. Sure, he wasn’t as charming, but he came correct. And even though it took him 10 minutes to get up the nerve to approach you, you shot him down. You shot ME down. And as I walked across that parking lot. Back to my 96 Honda Accord. Looking at you smile and shoot the breeze with some asshole. You thought to yourself, that guy aint shit. He is driving as old ass Honda. Let me see what’s up with this fine brother in front of me. The fine UNEMPLOYED brother. I’d call you a gold-digging bitch, but the mutha fucker didn’t have shit.
I’ve come to this conclusion. You women look at a laid back, regular guy like me and see I have a little something. Maybe a car, a job, an apartment. But definitely not the lap of luxury. And because of that lack of abundance. Of flash and flair, I must not be in a position to give you what I have. It’s an all or nothing mentality. A wealthy man is in a position to give you a significant portion of what he has without feeling any discomfort. He has money and material things to spare. Hence the reason why wealthy men can get any bitch they please. But because I can’t give you my all, you don’t want anything I can give you. Women won’t settle for less than ALL. Unless, it’s NOTHING. You see a dude with NOTHING to give, and that nurturing mechanism take over and you give him your ALL. Is that not the must ridiculous shit?!! Yet, you women do it all the time.
Absurdity on the highest scale.
Here’s some jokes for you:
Q: Do you know why there’s a hole in a man’s penis? A: So he can get air to his brain.
Q: If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story building at the same time, who would reach the ground first?
A: The woman, the man would get lost.
Q: What do you call a man with half a brain?
A: Gifted.
Men's brains are like the prison system -- not enough cells per man.
You hear it all the time. Women are smarter than men. On average, women have higher I.Q’s. Etc. Etc. I’m glad women get enjoyment from jokes like these. It must give them a ego boost, or something. Because from my experiences with women, just the opposite is true. Women make some of the DUMBEST ass decisions when it comes to dating and relationships. Really, I’m talking about absurdity on the highest scale. If you’re reading this and take issue with what I am saying, then you’re probably a dumb bitch yourself.
See, something I’ve never understood about women is this idea that you can change and mold a piece of shit into a marble sculpture of David. Try, try as you may. Go ahead. Polish him up. It was the Walgreens parking lot. When you met him he was unemployed. He had no ambition. No goals for the future. So what if he occasionally flirts with a girl or two when you’re out and about. He has a swagger about him that you are immensely attracted too. And the dick is good. QUALITY dick. So you keep him around, and sure enough 6 months later the dude is working. Driving YOUR car to get to that job, but it’s all good. He’s making money, not a lot. But it’s ok, because he loves you and you love him. Right?
GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!! Have we forgotten so soon what your little “work of art” is made of? Shit. Always was shit. Always will be shit. Oh yeah, it may have the outward appearance of David. However, its composition is completely shit. Through and through. So while you’re at work, thinking about this guy. Bragging to your girlfriends how good he is, he is using your car to get some ass from the bitch he was flirting with at Walgreens. Now that he’s working, he has a little pocket change too. So he can buy her material things and keep her ditsy ass content.
One day, you catch David slippin’. He’s left some text messages in his phone from Walgreens girl. You confront you on it. He says, “It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it”. And just like most women, you let it slide. See, some of you reading may think that is where the first mistake was committed. NO!!! The mistake was fuckin’ with David to begin with. You KNEW he was a playa from Jump Street. Shit, we are on mistake # 3 or 4 at this point. The dude is driving your car. In some cases, living with the chick. All the while steadily continuing with his player ways. Are you feeling me? To the women reading this blog, does this shit start to make since? Oh wise and intelligent beings…
Let’s continue. So of course situations continue to arise that make you begin to doubt this guys fidelity. He keeps on to lying. Each lie getting bigger. With each occurrence, instead of leaving the relationship, you continue to convince yourself otherwise. Is it self-esteem issues? Is it the thought of having wasted 6 months…2 years…10 years on some bullshit relationship and having to start over from scratch? Women come on. Tell me something. Give me an answer. WHY DO YOU STAY?!
When you finally do leave the bum, then all I hear women say is that men are dogs. That men aren’t worth a damn. See, that’s where you women are wrong. See, David wasn’t the only guy that approached you that day. You were approached earlier that day inside of Walgreens. The guy wasn’t dressed to impress. But he wasn’t looking like a bum either. He didn’t have the braggadocio style like David. But when he introduced himself, he did it in a respectful manner. Sure, he wasn’t as charming, but he came correct. And even though it took him 10 minutes to get up the nerve to approach you, you shot him down. You shot ME down. And as I walked across that parking lot. Back to my 96 Honda Accord. Looking at you smile and shoot the breeze with some asshole. You thought to yourself, that guy aint shit. He is driving as old ass Honda. Let me see what’s up with this fine brother in front of me. The fine UNEMPLOYED brother. I’d call you a gold-digging bitch, but the mutha fucker didn’t have shit.
I’ve come to this conclusion. You women look at a laid back, regular guy like me and see I have a little something. Maybe a car, a job, an apartment. But definitely not the lap of luxury. And because of that lack of abundance. Of flash and flair, I must not be in a position to give you what I have. It’s an all or nothing mentality. A wealthy man is in a position to give you a significant portion of what he has without feeling any discomfort. He has money and material things to spare. Hence the reason why wealthy men can get any bitch they please. But because I can’t give you my all, you don’t want anything I can give you. Women won’t settle for less than ALL. Unless, it’s NOTHING. You see a dude with NOTHING to give, and that nurturing mechanism take over and you give him your ALL. Is that not the must ridiculous shit?!! Yet, you women do it all the time.
Absurdity on the highest scale.
posted by Raven Vexation at 4:09 AM
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